THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE
In a “Dear Abby” column a couple of days ago, I read this letter:

DEAR ABBY: My 22-year-old niece, "Brittany," married her boyfriend of many years last month in a lavish production of a wedding financed entirely by her father (my brother). On the invitations, it was mentioned that their home was fully furnished, so in lieu of gifts, they'd appreciate money for their honeymoon to the Dominican Republic.

Most family members generously complied and chipped in $300 to $500 each. My widowed grandmother, who lived on a fixed income, even sent them $50.

Four days after their return from the honeymoon, Brittany threw her husband of two weeks out of the house and moved in with her new boyfriend, whom she'd first met when he "entertained" at her bachelorette party three weeks prior. To say we are all surprised is putting it mildly.

No one has heard from Brittany since, and no explanation was offered. My mother recently got her on the phone, and Brittany quickly ended the conversation by claiming that all the money had been "spent" and that her now ex-husband had any funds that remained. (We know this can't be true because the distraught groom recently approached my brother and asked him to pay for the annulment.)

Doesn't etiquette dictate that Brittany return all gifts -- including cash -- as the marriage ended just days after the checks cleared the bank? Is this why there's a 12-month window in which to send wedding gifts? -- ANGRY IN SAN FRANCISCO

Now, here’s what bugs me (okay, a lot bugs me but this specific thing really bugs me). The anti-gay and anti-gay marriage crowd claim that their passionate objections against us and our families stem from Biblical and moral values. They want to legislate morality, so to speak.

Yet, here’s this 22 year old girl who took her husband and her family for a ride, and then tossed the marriage aside for a new man, only two weeks after the marriage. This 22 year old girl is old enough to vote on whether or not it’s “moral” for me to marry my partner, but where are these conservatives in their push to protect the sanctity of marriage against the likes of this girl?

HATE CRIMES
When was the last time you read in the paper about a woman beating the shit out of some guy that made a sexual advance toward her? When was the last time you saw a story about a guy beating the shit out of some woman for flirting with him?

It’s beyond my comprehension how a human being can use “He made a pass at me” as a defense for beating a person unconscious or to death because of a perceived homosexual advance.

Unwanted sexual advances are unwanted sexual advances, plain and simple. But what makes men think that unwanted sexual advances from other men warrant, explain, or excuse violence against the other man? Can we buy a defense of Susie saying “Your honor, I beat that man senseless with a hammer because he came on to me and I was afraid he was going to rape me.”

Yet, here we go again:

(Jackson, Alabama) A 52 year old Alabama man is clinging to life in a Jackson hospital after what police call a homophobic attack. A 26 year old man is charged with attempted murder in the beating Billy Sanford. Police said that when he was arrested Marcus Dewayne Kelley confessed saying that he attacked Sanford with a hammer because the slight older man had made sexual advances toward him.

To add insult to injury, of course Alabama doesn’t have a hate crimes law.

HUMOR

I’m sorry, I can’t help but laugh at stuff like this.

POP QUIZ

Are you a lesbian?

My Results:
You scored

165

The lesbianity is strong in this one. You love the ladies. Either that or you just like cats and bad music. I bet you've got a good collection of baseball caps. Or are they scalps from your sexual conquests? Oh, no. They're baseball caps (sorry 'bout that).